Greg: We have enough room in the archive room for another 12 years now.
Patrick: Christa, add that to the budget. We need a new archive room in 12 years.
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Author Archives: Alan V
Budget
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Emily: If anyone is free to compile the calendar… Christa, what are you doing over there?
Christa: Looking at the budget.
Emily: That’s funny. We don’t have a budget. Convenient story.
Cows
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(Playing 6 nimmt, Mark’s username is KrazyKow)
Alan: Wow, KrazyKow is not crazy for cows.
Mark: Yeah, the cows are crazy. I don’t want them.
Cows
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(Playing 6 nimmt)
Tim: Now that I have 21 oxen, I’m going to make it to Oregon faster than you.
Alan: Actually, Dan has more than you.
Tim: They won’t make it through the night.
Arabic
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Tim: No, no, I’m speaking in Arabic. That’s what everyone speaks in Portugal these days.
Cows
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(Playing 6 nimmt on BSW with random people)
Keith: I wonder if this guy is a professional
Ian: Professional cow avoider!
Keith: Isn’t that called the running of the bulls?
Hinge
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(Talking about moving beds up the tiny staircase.)
Ben: We had to cut her boxspring in half.
Jon: You braced it, right?
Ben: I used a hinge.
Jon: Did you use two hinges?
Ben: I used a hinge. She hasn’t fallen through her bed yet.
Nipples
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Sergio: Who here doesn’t think nipples are important?
Ben: They’re like little eyes.
Sergio: Always looking in opposite directions.
Jon: Like an antelope.
Sperpes
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(In a discussion about exotic diseases, leading to diseases from Europa.)
Sergio: It’d be cool to have life in our solar system.
Jon: Even if it’s microbial?
Ben: Now you can get space herpes!
Jon: We’ll call it sperpes.
Pittsburgh
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(Ben is moving to Seattle)
Simiao: How long have you lived in Pittsburgh?
Ben: 6 and a half years.
Simiao: How can you not be sentimental?
Jon: It’s Pittsburgh.