Alan: There’s a new Eevee Pokemon TCG set
Greg: E-vee!
Greg: Now they have F-vee and G-vee
Greg: When they get to R-vee they’re gonna have problems… it’s just a big bus
Eevee
Quote
Reply
Tag Archives: AlanV
Cake
Quote
Alan: We ask each other “made from or intended for?”. Like cat food, made from or intended for cats? Coffee cake, made from or intended for coffee?
Ian: Cat food is food you eat while also eating a cat
Ian: I mean, if you follow the logic of coffee cake
Mars: I try to buy duck food, and they try to sell me dog food made from ducks
Kittens
Quote
(Playing You Don’t Know Jack and one of the possible responses for “I roll, pitch, and yaw” is “kitten”)
Alan: You can also pitch them
Dan: They don’t like it, but you sure can
Keith: But do kittens yaw?
Dan: That’s how they keep landing feet side down
Jello
Quote
Alan: What’s aspic?
Tim: It’s jello made of meat
Ian: Isn’t jello already made of meat?
Tim: More made of meat
Assistant
Quote
Alan: That’s why they name virtual assistants things you wouldn’t normally say. So you don’t unintentionally say their names in conversation.
Ian: My mind went to a bad place. Like “What’s a name nobody would have? Oh, Hitler! They should name it Hitler.”
Mars: Wouldn’t make it past marketing.
Poop
Quote
Alan: Isn’t human poop not a fertilizer?
Mars: No. Only animals that eat a vegetarian diet.
Kayleigh: Vegetarian poop though, and vegan poop.
Tim: That sounds like it’s a poop substitute.
Ohio
Quote
Alan: Ohio has an… eye?
Tim: Yeah. It’s the third letter
Images
Quote
(Making fun of how Survive the Internet gives you over 70 seconds to select between two photo prompts)
Alan: Quick! You only have 70 seconds left to choose your photo!
Greg: Oh no. I’ll look up the top 50 results for each of these on Google Image search and see which has better comedic potential
Julia Child
Quote
Greg: Julia Child makes asparagus
Alan: Literally? Like she’s pooping them out?
Greg: No! Julia Child *cooks* asparagus
Alan: Okay, because that would be a very different kind of show
Greg: She is not a vegetable garden
Greg: Well, she might be now, because she is dead
Cheerios
Quote
(Mars is talking about taking their dogs to the vet)
Mars: We were afraid they were going to cut off their cheerios
Alan: Wait what?
Mars: Since Tristan loves cheerios, there are cheerios all over the floor…
Alan: Ohhh, literal cheerios
Tim: I thought that was going to be a euphemism