TYteStuff1126: i don’t think that my GCN will work anymore
SoAL Gilder: uh oh
SoAL Gilder: what happened
TYteStuff1126: i just had an orgasm/sneeze/puke on it
SoAL Gilder: …
TYteStuff1126: i orgasmed
TYteStuff1126: then sneezed
TYteStuff1126: then puked onto my gamecube
SoAL Gilder: …
SoAL Gilder: eeewwwww

TYteStuff1126: so you’re having either a “got to go” or a “gtg” this weekend
SoAL Gilder: get together 😛
SoAL Gilder: i abbreviate it gtg
SoAL Gilder: like on my website
TYteStuff1126: lol
TYteStuff1126: or how about…gt
TYteStuff1126: Get Together
SoAL Gilder: Get ToGether
SoAL Gilder: 😛
SoAL Gilder: GTG works better
SoAL Gilder: or, for every syllable, it’d be GTGT
SoAL Gilder: Get ToGeTher
SoAL Gilder: 😀
SoAL Gilder: its DNA!

TYteStuff1126: my arms smell like hair color
SoAL Gilder: … no comment
TYteStuff1126: i colored the hair on my arms blue
TYteStuff1126: my legs red
TYteStuff1126: and my head blonde
SoAL Gilder: …….
TYteStuff1126: my eye brows are white
SoAL Gilder: i seriously cant imagine that 😛
TYteStuff1126: my sideburns are pink
SoAL Gilder: …
TYteStuff1126: and my pubic hairs are yellow
SoAL Gilder: ……..I do NOT want to see that
SoAL Gilder: but everything else I have GOT to see

TYteStuff1126: hurm
SoAL Gilder: hurm??
TYteStuff1126: talk
SoAL Gilder: k
TYteStuff1126: …
TYteStuff1126: lol
TYteStuff1126: talk!
SoAL Gilder: ummm
SoAL Gilder: I like cheese
TYteStuff1126: :-X

TYteStuff1126: Two surfers went to court after one allegedly stole the other surfer’s wave. The case was dismissed after court officials found it impossible to put a monetary value on the wave.
SoAL Gilder: heh
TYteStuff1126: A man riding his bike home from work at night with no lights, only reflectors, was hit by a Jeep after the driver ran a stop sign. The bicyclist sued the bike manufacturer because he was not warned that reflectors might not be enough to prevent an accident. The man was awarded $6 million.
SoAL Gilder: these are weird
TYteStuff1126: A Texan woman was awarded $780,000 after she sued a furniture store. She sued because she tripped and fell over a child running amok in the store. Surprisingly, she won the case, even though the child was her own.
TYteStuff1126: A man is suing a bank that he attempted to rob. After employees of the bank realized he was deaf, they were able to talk during the attempted robbery, which made it easy for them to stall the would-be robber until police arrived. The failed bank robber is suing the bank for discrimination.
TYteStuff1126: A California woman sued a grocery store after she dropped a six-pack of beer on her feet. The woman was not injured, but she said that it hurt. She won the lawsuit.
SoAL Gilder: heh
SoAL Gilder: these are great
TYteStuff1126: “One day a lady who worked at the boat docks in Boston brought home a stray dog. The next day, when she arrived hjom from work she found that it had killed and eaten her car. When she took the dog into the vet to have it put down, she was told that it really wasn’t a dog, but a 40-pound Cambodian rat that had come into the country on one of the ships
TYteStuff1126: A sheriff was passing a farm one day when he saw a man standing on the side of the road yelling “Pig Pig Pig!” the cope was very angry and yelled back “Redneck Redneck Redneck!” seconds later the cop ran right into the rednecks prized pig
SoAL Gilder: O.o
SoAL Gilder: poor person

SoAL Gilder: I really need to change that away message 😛
TYteStuff1126: why?
SoAL Gilder: I’m in the bathroom….I could just be peeing…I had a lot to drink today. At least I’m not a cat. Their urine is so concentrated it smells really bad. Can’t you just smell that right now? Or maybe I’m on the toilet…Making poop…it’s all brown and stuff…or is it green? Maybe it’s diarrhea and it’s all liquidy. Whatever it is it smells really bad…At least I’m not a dog. Dogs lick their butts. Wonder what it tastes like? Oh never mind. Hey, it’s your fault for IMing me when there’s that little away message by my name!
SoAL Gilder: there we go
SoAL Gilder: all done
TYteStuff1126: I am in the bathroom, or is it my car?…i could be shitting, peeing, or well…if it’s my car i’d be having sex and something else besides pee would be exiting my penile tube…but lets not go that far, back to pee and shit…yeah both are green both are brown but when they’re black you should go to the doc…red isn’t good either. you should pee quite often because it releases wastes and amonia that is built up and has been filtered through your liver…and people eat live…well, chicken and pork liver…hell, I even eat liver…it tastes good…idk why, maybe that’s why there are parasites and worms crawling out of my ass and all over my shit…but that’s just too far, anyways peeing…everybody pees, everybody poops, everybody sees my poo!..yeah it’s shiney, sometimes it’s really liquidy and blurbles out of my asshole, but hey…it’s gotta have some chunks or it wouldn’t be shit…it would be like a girl, pissing out your asshole, well hey, you’re either puking (another story) or have said i’m perverted right now…leave a message and when i’m done with whatever i’m doing i might IM you back
SoAL Gilder: OMG
SoAL Gilder: use that as your away message!
TYteStuff1126: lol
SoAL Gilder: no seriously

SoAL Gilder: I eat cake
SoAL Gilder: Take CIA-e
SoAL Gilder: I take ace
TYteStuff1126: …
SoAL Gilder: Darn you
SoAL Gilder: your DNA
TYteStuff1126: i drink piss?
SoAL Gilder: drink is sip
SoAL Gilder: 😀
SoAL Gilder: i drink piss
TYteStuff1126: andyou eat shit?
SoAL Gilder: ….
SoAL Gilder: ummm
TYteStuff1126: i gargle puke
SoAL Gilder: ……….
SoAL Gilder: im just playing with letter orders
TYteStuff1126: ok
TYteStuff1126: i eat cake….let’s see
SoAL Gilder: taei kaec
SoAL Gilder: 😛
TYteStuff1126: i cake tea
SoAL Gilder: lol
TYteStuff1126: i ace kate
SoAL Gilder: oohhhh
SoAL Gilder: go you 🙂
SoAL Gilder: how was she?
TYteStuff1126: lol