Keith: My mouth is doing something funny.
Mouth
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Category Archives: Quotes
Shark attacks
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*Playing Wits and Wagers
Isaac: How many unprovoked shark attacks were there in 2004?
Anna: Well that’s realy subjective.
Isaac: I know, right?
Anna: What, you’re poking it with sticks. Hey, hey, are you provoked yet? Hey, hey, I’m bleeding!
Infinite alcohol
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Charles: Are you sure we’ll get drunk?
Alan: With bottomless mimosas?
Ian: It depends… do you get drunk on infinite alcohol?
Tests
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Ian: Oh, you can take medical tests by texting ‘TESTS’? Follow these instructions: Pee into your phone.
Bars
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Zeke: I should mod my antenna bars to be penises
Zeke: so I can say “I have great service in here, look, 4 gay bars”
Alan: um
Zeke: all increasing in length
Zeke: maybe the wifi indicator next to it can be a sphincter
Zeke: yus
Sex Clue
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Alan: meh, i couldve sworn i was right with my guess of ghannema with the used condom in the dining room
Alan: i suck at sex-clue
Alan: i want to make this….
Alan: it’s like clue except you figure out whose baby it is
gregh1983: Ha ha ha!!!
Alan: was it miss scarlet in the conservatory with the alien probe?
gregh1983: Or Colonel Mustard in the billiard room with the illicit magazine?
Alan: or mr. green in the kitchen with the aborted-but-living fetus?
gregh1983: Eeew, how unsanitary.
Alan: eh, whatever works
Alan: just shove it up there
gregh1983: If this game shows up at the next Get Board Get Carded, I will know who to blame.
Skin
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Tim: There are more important things to life than skin
Physics
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nukeade: Physics is still not as popular as genital warts.
Resume
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teisenbe: I gave sully’s resume to Jane Street, not realizing he had interviewed with them already. I just wanted schwag. Then they started asking me questions about the resume. I just gave noncommital answers. Like, they asked me about my time in compilers. “I could have written a compiler. Yeah”
Growing
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(Talking about the evolution of Sharon’s bar)
Zeke: Does that mean it stopped growing? I’m afraid to ask
Alan: That’s what she said