Alan: Ian would like it.
Tim: Ian doesn’t like anything.
Ian: I don’t like anything.
Things
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Tag Archives: AlanV
Cat sushi
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Tim: What doesn’t Greg like?
Alan: sushi
Alan: we can make kitty sushi
Alan: he wont like that
Tim: Yes
Tim: I see no problem with this
Tim: I also suggest making cats out of sushi
Tim: Meow
Alan: wait… cats out of sushi?
Tim: Meow
Alan: i… dont understand
Tim: Step 1: Get sushi
Tim: Step 2: Build cat
Tim: Step 3: Meow
Choices
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Ally: Choices are hard.
Alan: Let’s go shopping.
Mark: That doesn’t help with choices. That just gives you more choices.
Expensive
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Mark: These are too expensive.
Alan: That’s what she said.
Mark: I don’t know what that means.
Trisha: It means you’re a prostitute. And your rates are too high.
Infinite alcohol
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Charles: Are you sure we’ll get drunk?
Alan: With bottomless mimosas?
Ian: It depends… do you get drunk on infinite alcohol?
Bars
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Zeke: I should mod my antenna bars to be penises
Zeke: so I can say “I have great service in here, look, 4 gay bars”
Alan: um
Zeke: all increasing in length
Zeke: maybe the wifi indicator next to it can be a sphincter
Zeke: yus
Sex Clue
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Alan: meh, i couldve sworn i was right with my guess of ghannema with the used condom in the dining room
Alan: i suck at sex-clue
Alan: i want to make this….
Alan: it’s like clue except you figure out whose baby it is
gregh1983: Ha ha ha!!!
Alan: was it miss scarlet in the conservatory with the alien probe?
gregh1983: Or Colonel Mustard in the billiard room with the illicit magazine?
Alan: or mr. green in the kitchen with the aborted-but-living fetus?
gregh1983: Eeew, how unsanitary.
Alan: eh, whatever works
Alan: just shove it up there
gregh1983: If this game shows up at the next Get Board Get Carded, I will know who to blame.
Growing
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(Talking about the evolution of Sharon’s bar)
Zeke: Does that mean it stopped growing? I’m afraid to ask
Alan: That’s what she said
Robot
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Keith: Boop.
Alan: Boop?
Keith: I’m a robot.
Puns
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nukeade: Now you don’t want to talk to me anymore? This wouldn’t be some kind of punishment?
Alan: 😛
nukeade: Should they lock me up in the punitentiary?
Alan: you are a bad person
nukeade: You can punch me when I get back.
nukeade: Whether or not the Steelers win this weekend, you can be sure that I started the punting early.
Alan: …
nukeade: Don’t worry. I know that whatever happuns, you’ll forgive me.