(Alan pats Jennifer on the head)
Jennifer: Yes, I’m tiny.
Alan: I just want to pick you up and carry you off somewhere.
Jennifer: People always tell me: Be careful! You’re grab-and-go size!
Tiny
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Author Archives: Alan V
Gum
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Daniel: I love how people still stick gum to the bottom of desks.
Allison: It gives me hope for the future generations.
Pizza
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(Only three people have shown up to the writer’s training workshop, where pizza is provided)
Emily: We should have said it was “mandatory”.
Josh: MANDATORY PIZZA!
Salary
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(People are saying that they don’t want Greg to ever leave the Tartan.)
Greg: Well, if I can work at the Tartan and get paid like a full time job…
Madelyn: Next year’s budget: Salary for Greg. We can do without paper.
Alcohol
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Emily: I like websites that help you become an alcoholic.
Bear
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(Emily puts the bear on Madelyn.)
Madelyn: No!
Emily: I’m putting bear butt on you.
Madelyn: No. Don’t put bear on me while you’re molesting it.
Emily: I was molesting it before. Then I set the molest-y part on you.
Article
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Alan: I will write you a forum article. At some point. I just don’t have opinions about anything.
Josh: It doesn’t have to be big. Even if it’s little. Just water it and it will grow into a 4000-character article.
Supply chain
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(Playing Power Grid; the resource track is extremely depleted and coal is extremely expensive.)
Keith: I sense that Keithco is going to run into some supply chain trouble.
(The 35 electro power plant [1 oil -> 5 cities] then sells for 90 electro.)
(Later…)
Dan: There is a high level cabinet meeting occurring right now where Angela Merkel is pleading, begging for anything they can get.
Keith: Please, please give us your trash.
Dan: Greece, we will give you euros for your trash.
Resources
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(Playing Power Grid; Keith buys out all of the coal, there is no garbage left, and nukes are 12 each.)
Alan: Sad resource market is sad.
Keith: It’s because we’ve had crappy plants for so long we’ve completely destroyed the earth.
Good
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Christa: It’s so early! We did so good!
Emily: “Well”
Christa: So good!
Emily: I’m going to punch you in the ovaries.