Emily: Bryan! Have some ravioli! Have a cupcake shaped like a Pokemon!
Bryan: They’re shaped like Pokeballs.
Emily: They have Pokemon… in them.
Patrick: Like ground-up Charmander.
Cupcakes
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Tag Archives: PatrickK
Pancake
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Emily: I love pancakes. And I love Patrick. I just want to eat a pancake off of your face. It’s what I dream about.
Patrick: It’s what I dream about too. I just call them nightmares.
Mind blown
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Emily: Is it mind-blowing and orgasmic?
Patrick: Could it be mind-blowing and not orgasmic? Could it be orgasmic and not mind-blowing?
Emily: It could be an “eh” orgasm.
Later…
(Anna draws an analogy: Rectangle : Square as orgasm : mind-blowing)
Alan: I think… that’s backward? Everything mind-blowing is an orgasm?
Anna: You’re actually having intellectual orgasms all the time. You just don’t know it.
Sentences
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Patrick: Katiegreg… pick a style for the Pillbox cover. Do you want complete sentences or a continuation of the big words? Pick a style and we will stick with it for all eternity.
Anna: No pressure.
Katie: I like big words.
Patrick: That wasn’t the question.
Button
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Patrick: How do I make it…. there’s a button for that right?
Stacey: You’re going to need to be more specific.
Fuzzy
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Celia: Patrick, your hair is fuzzier than usual. Not blurry, fuzzy.
(Patrick messes with his hair)
Patrick: Yeah, well, I washed it.
Vague
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Patrick: “…explores contemporary issues” is so vague. Can we be more vague?
Greg: “Explores issues”
Patrick: “Explores”
Pizza
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Patrick: Emily, do you want this piece of pizza you dropped on the floor?
Emily: I would love it. I go by the two hour rule…
Greg: They’ve done studies. It’s actually fine. Unless the floor is covered in e-coli.
Mosquitos
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(The group walks past a puppy on the Cut and everyone “Awww”s)
Greg: I’m more of a cat person.
Emily: I love all animals. I’m not racist.
Greg: Even mosquitos?
Emily: Mosquitos aren’t animals.
Patrick: Mosquitos aren’t animals.
Emily: Greg was wrong about a SECOND thing.
Fired
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(Michael is firing Patrick as Assistant EIC because he was just elected Publisher)
Michael: You’re fired.
Patrick: It doesn’t work that way. You have to tell the personnel manager.
Michael: I’m delegating to you to tell Sarah that you’re fired.