Michael: I don’t think I’m ok with you assaulting people with my notepad.
Emily: But you left it in the office. You bequeathed it to me! I declare it!
Patrick: What does that button do?
Stacey: That’s the button that makes it look like it’s actually on the page.
Michael: No, it’s the button that I don’t know what it does, but it makes me feel better when I press it.
(Michael is acting copy manager and editor-in-chief)
Michael: Because people are not here doing their jobs, I am signing off on this for thirds. And finals. It is done.
Michael: How Pradeep is saying lies.
Daniel: Did you just… say… words?
Alan: Is this supposed to be “Housing Guide 2011-2012”? It’s for the 2012-2013 school year.
Michael: How about just “Housing Guide 2012”?
Courtney: Then it doesn’t fill the space and I have to come up with more words.
Michael: “Housing Guide for 2012”?
Nick: How about “Housing Guide five 2012”?
Michael: It’s how to reconstruct the Tartan if there’s nothing but the constitution and bylaws.
Madelyn: It’s like the Tartan apocalypse. Everyone on the Tartan quits because of the Pillbox cover.
(Allison turns around looking horrified.)
Christa: The look on Allison’s face was awesome.
Madelyn: I want a Tartan shirt.
Michael: If you give me 15 dollars, I will ensure you have the future opportunity to obtain a Tartan shirt.
Greg: For another 15 dollars?
(Discussing a board ed about student government’s inaction)
Emily: I think the point is that they get a $10,000 budget… what are they doing with it?
Michael: That is NOT the opinion of the Tartan.
Michael: Thank you for writing, contributing, arting…
Anna: Arting! It’s a verb now!